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It is one of the most frustrating things a female entrepreneur will deal with. If you’ve been in business for even six months, you’ve probably been at the butt end of chauvinism in some form. Being talked down to, talked over, passed over, even being called emotional for simple expressions are all things that you may someday experience.
While running my tech company, GreenCup Digital, I had a great consultation with the Founder and Manager of a boutique engineering firm. They wanted SEO work done on their website but, after the first five minutes, I could tell they weren’t even sure what to ask for. That was okay. We were in business to demystify tech. I explained what Search Engine Optimization entailed and what my team would do, how it would improve their lead generations, and made some recommendations. By the end of the meeting, they were asking for a contract. I love it when consultations slam dunk like that.
The 180
The next morning, before I even had the chance to send over our proposal and contract, I received an email from the Manager stating they had a big client coming in that day, and would I be willing to act as their secretary during the four-hour visit. I was appalled and disappointed.
First off, we live in the 21st century. I would have been sure that I had misread the email if I hadn’t experienced similarly odd interactions with other male clients. This, however, was by far the most blatant act of chauvinism I had, to date, experienced.
Mostly, I was disappointed. Disappointed in their behavior, and disappointed that I would have to pass up this business opportunity. This is not the way to start a business relationship, and continuing with them after this request would have left me on less than equal footing with their leadership. Unfortunately, I also had to think about my business’ reputation and felt I couldn’t call them out on their actions.
How I Handled the Chauvinism
The first thing I did was forward the email to an unemployed friend. They had offered a small cash stipend for the four hours, its entirety smaller than our hourly rate, and my friend would have appreciated it. I then responded to their email that I was unable to be their secretary and that I had passed on the opportunity to an unemployed friend. I chose not to call them out because I didn’t want to risk the reputation of my company, but I was sure the word ‘unemployed’ preempted referencing my friend so they had a better feel that their request was out of place.
Secondly, I contacted a male colleague in the SEO / Website industry and asked if he had room for a new project. With him willing to take on the client, I then sent the client a separate email and explained that I did not have room in my portfolio to take them on, and referred them to my colleague.
Oddly, the Founder responded wondering why I wouldn’t work with them and requesting I reconsider. This gave me the impression that the Manager had not communicated with the Founder about our communique. I thought it not my place to cause a rift, and maintained my story that I simply couldn’t take them on at that time.
Two Years Later
I received a cold call email from the same client, offering their engineering services for local inventors. I don’t know how I got on the list, as the consultation we did with them was for website development, but it was a lengthy sales email.
At first, I had to laugh. What was this email doing in my inbox? Then I had to decide if I wanted to respond? I almost didn’t hesitate. I sent three sentences, and feel like it was the right thing to do.
“Hi ____. We did a consultation for your website and SEO a couple of years ago. Glad to see you doing well. Happy New Year.”
It was a strange way to start the new year, but it’s a good reminder that you never know what is coming around the corner.
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